My family is black and white but my friends are shades of grey

My family is so black and white. They are either happy or mad. Falling apart or completely in love. Throwing metaphorical punches or giving hugs and kisses. Seriously. Everything is either completely bad or completely good. There is NO in between with my family.

This is one of the reasons that I have not been able to tell my dad about the sexual abuse that I experienced when I was a kid. I can’t tell him because I don’t know how he will react. He will either be super supportive and mature about it or he will completely flip and lose his temper and start a huge fight with my whole family. There’s no happy medium so I’m too terrified to tell him because I don’t know how he will react. Honestly, I’m scared to tell him a lot of things.

My friends, on the other hand, are the shades of grey. They supportive at all the right times, stern when they need to be, sometimes angry, sometimes happy, and anything in between. The difference is that I can generally trust my friends to be reasonable in their reactions and I know that it is not only going to be either completely bad or completely wonderful, but that there are in-betweens as well.

I am so thankful for every single one of my friends. They are so amazing and supportive. They really are the only thing holding me together sometimes.

My heart goes out to each and every one of my friends who has seen me at my worst and still stood by my side. To these people, I want to say I love you and I am thankful for everything you have done.

xo

Ayla

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