Thank you to the blogosphere

I want to take a moment to thank everyone who has followed my blog and supported me throughout the last year and a bit. When I started this blog I had intended to use it as a means of connecting with eating disorder recovery blogs and finding support for my recovery. At the time, I had no idea the extent of my mental turmoil. Since then, I have been diagnosed with four mental illnesses with symptoms of two more.

That said, I believe that I am making progress and strides toward recovery. I have been undergoing Dialectical Behavioral Therapy for seven months now. Since starting my treatment I have made tremendous improvements in my bulimia recovery. While I am currently trying to fight off a relapse, I am still proud of myself for coming as far as I have.

I am also proud of myself simply for taking that first step and getting the help that I really needed. While I recently found out that I may have no choice but to discontinue my therapy, I am trying to focus on the positive and I am trying not to think about it until I know that I am completely out of options.

Throughout my recovery, I have found support and encouragement on my blog. You, my followers, have left me words of advice, empathy, and support in some of my darkest times. Words cannot express how grateful I am for every single one of my followers and supporters. Even when everything else in my life seems to be falling apart I feel as though I have another place that I can go for support.

I often feel misunderstood and frustrated because everyone in my “real” life just assumes that they know who I am. This really bothers me because there are only 4 people who know some of the details of my struggles and even they don’t know everything. I feel like I have to hide everything from the people in my life for fear of them reacting negatively. However, when I am online here I feel accepted. I can be honest on my blog without fearing judgement or stigmatization. For this, I am so thankful. It is comforting to know that there are people out there who can relate to my struggles, even if they cannot 100% understand how I am feeling.

So with that said, THANK YOU.

You are the light at the end of my tunnel.

xo

Ayla

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