I have some exciting news! I am moving into my very first apartment in just 2 short months! I’m really excited and I’ve been shopping around for some of the essentials that I will need for my first place, but I guess the one thing that I’m most worried about is how this might effect my recovery. The last time I moved out it was for my first year of University and I ended up moving in with my cousin in order to save money because it was much cheaper than paying for residence and she lived about 45 min away from campus via bus. So it’s not like I have no experience of moving out whatsoever; however, this will be the first time where I will be living without any family.
When I told my therapist about this, she was both happy and apprehensive. The positive side of things is that I will be away from all of the family fighting and I will no longer have to live with my abuser, both of which are huge triggers for me. However, the downside is that I have a lot more opportunity for relapse if I am living in a situation in which nobody is supervising me. That said, technically I am not being supervised right now since my family doesn’t actually know about my illnesses, so I am hopeful that I will not necessarily relapse. The only thing that might be a bit of a concern is the fact that my building has a gym which could be problematic. Those of you who have been following me for a while know that my bulimia does not involve vomiting, it involved over-exercise and caloric restriction. Therefore, if I become overwhelmed or stressed, there is a chance that I may be triggered to relapse into my patterns of over-exercising. But I’m hoping that the support that I have found online coupled with my therapy will help to prevent this!
Aside from the mental health concerns, I am really excited to move out! I feel like it is the next step in becoming an independent person. I can be responsible for myself and I don’t have to worry about reporting to anyone. On top of that, I feel as though my parents will respect me more as an adult once I am out on my own, paying my own bills, making my own decisions.
Looking forward to the next chapter of my life!